Increase Your Influence by Becoming More Likeable


(Part 3 of 5 on Increasing Influence)

“Harriet gets others to cooperate on projects when no one else can,” commented a peer.

“It’s true,” said another.  “Peers, employees in other departments and even customers and vendors go out of their way to help her.”

“Everyone likes Harriet.”

When asked why Harriet had so much influence, acquaintances responded:

“She is very understanding and always takes an interest in what you are doing.”

“She is a genuine person.  What you see is what you get.”

“She does not draw attention to herself, but she is very confident in her abilities.”

“Harriet is open-minded and good-natured.”

“Harriet is calm and consistent; never seems to get ruffled.”

In other words, Harriet is a person that is easy to like and likeable people are more influential.  When given a choice of helping a repugnant person with a high-value request and a likeable person with a less-valued request, almost two-thirds of employees prioritize the “likeable” request over the “repugnant.”

To increase your influence, behave in ways that are more winsome.  Ask questions.  Listen.  Discuss common interests.  Offer support.  Acknowledge others.  Be quick to give credit. Be a good neighbor.

But always remember, these behaviors make you more attractive only if they are genuine.

 

Eat the Live Frog First


Ascham admitted, “As I was driving to work, I knew I needed to talk to Reginald.  He has an ego as big as the parking lot.”

Reginald, an employee with excellent work skills, sometimes produced excellent work– sometimes not.   Last week, Reginald disappointed his team with a sloppy analysis on a critical issue.  When questioned, Reginald became defensive, blamed others and stated, “I don’t think this is important anyway.”

Ascham said, “When I arrived at work, Reginald was on my mind; but I decided to respond to a couple of emails.  It took longer than I intended.  Then I got a call from the vice-president asking for a status update.”

Mid-day approached and Ascham had still not contacted Reginald.  “I intended to stop by after lunch but decided to go back to my office and update a couple of proposals,” Ascham said.

Just prior to leaving work, Ascham finally stopped by and had the awkward conversation with Reginald.  “If I had taken care of this first,” Ascham said, “I would not have worried about it all day.”

Mark Twain said that if the first thing you do each day is to eat a live frog, you can go through the day knowing that this is probably the worst thing that will happen to you.